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O’Conor “Conor” Ashby II is committed to fighting cancer in memory of his father. As the nation celebrates and honors dads for giving so much of themselves this Father’s Day, we also remember those lost.

Conor Ashby was just 11 years old when he lost his father to lung cancer.

James Ashby III was an attorney and community leader in Fredericksburg, Virginia. The 50-year-old dad to three boys is remembered for his larger than life personality, a quick wit and powerful, bold laugh – and his even bigger heart. He would hold court on the sidelines at his kids’ soccer or basketball games, asking folks how they were and cracking jokes. His kindness and commitment to giving back was his dad’s greatest trait, his son says. He was always lending an ear or a hand to neighbors and acquaintances alike. It’s a trait that Ashby strives to carry on.

Three years after losing his dad, Ashby’s mother, Louise, was diagnosed with breast cancer. ““All I knew at that time was that cancer kills,” he said. “I thought that I was going to be an orphan.” Thankfully, his mom fought and beat her cancer. Ashby was married in 2021, with his mother by his side.

Twenty-seven years after his father’s passing, Ashby’s experiences continue to motivate him to work toward a future without cancer to ensure no other family will have to face the fear or loss from a cancer diagnosis. He’s inspired by Massey’s vision for a future without cancer.

"The loss of my father at a young age has had a profound impact on my life, of course,” he says. “Cancer steals too many loved ones far too soon. Massey's unwavering dedication to innovative cancer research and prevention gives me hope that others won't have to face this kind of devastating loss.”

"Massey's unwavering dedication to innovative cancer research and prevention gives me hope that others won't face a similar devastating loss. Massey is saving lives." Conor Ashby

“Giving back was something my dad instilled in me and that I feel compelled to carry on,” Ashby said. He first got involved with Massey in 2013. “Supporting Massey was a no-brainer, given my family’s history with cancer,” he said. That history includes not only Ashby’s dad and mom, but also a cousin and uncle, who are cancer survivors and an aunt who lost her battle with lung cancer.

Ashby served as a member of the Massey Alliance, Massey’s young professionals board, for nine years, including a term as president. In 2019, he chaired the Massey Challenge, the annual fundraiser that’s tied to the Ukrop’s Monument Avenue 10K. Last year, he joined the Massey Advisory Board, where he now serves.

“My involvement with Massey has been the most rewarding work I’ve ever been involved with.”

Ashby also knows that the earlier cancer is detected, the better the outcome. He notes his mother’s strength and fortitude during her cancer journey as a continuing inspiration. “My mother beat cancer while also taking care of three wild boys.” Part of his determination to raise awareness about Massey grows from his knowledge of how important healthy living and staying up-to-date on cancer screenings are.

A photo of James Ashby III (left) at Conor Ashby’s 2021 wedding. Ashby was an attorney and community advocate in Fredericksburg, Virginia, whose loss still inspires his son to support Massey Cancer Center as a volunteer leader. Conor and his mother (right) pictured at his wedding.

This month, Massey received comprehensive cancer center designation from the National Cancer Institute (NCI), a designation shared by only 4% of cancer centers in the U.S. That puts Massey among the nation’s elite cancer centers and means the center will qualify for additional dollars to conduct research and transdisciplinary work to better serve our community.

Ashby attended an event celebrating Massey’s new comprehensive designation in June, alongside Massey director and Lipman Chair in Oncology Robert A. Winn, M.D., VCU President Michael Rao, Ph.D., Richmond Mayor Levar Stoney, Virginia Secretary of Health John Littel, and other Massey and community leaders. “It hit me at the comprehensive announcement, what we have accomplished. Now the world knows what we’ve always known: that Massey delivers top, world-class cancer care right here in Virginia.”

During the past 10 years, Ashby has seen awareness grow about what Massey is doing to save lives through clinical research and clinical trials and by promoting wellness and survivorship. He hopes his involvement, and Massey’s comprehensive status, will drive home to others the importance of screenings and of healthy living. “Unfortunately, most people show up to their doctors with stage 3 or 4 cancers because they haven’t gotten the necessary, early screenings,” he said. “It needs to be caught when it’s at a more treatable stage 1 or 2.”

There is still more work to be done, Ashby added. And he’s here for it.

“We are going to celebrate this, and rightfully so. But until there is a cure for cancer, our work is not done.”

Massey has given a lot to Ashby personally, too, he says. He met his wife, Caroline, through an introduction from a fellow Massey Alliance member. The couple shares a love for travel (their most recent trip to the island of Roatán Honduras, which boasts the second largest coral reef in the world, is a favorite), attending live music and comedy shows and spending as much time outdoors as possible, hiking and camping. They support each other in their individual philanthropic work.

“I have built relationships with unbelievably passionate and inspiring people through my work at Massey. When I think or talk about the Alliance or Advisory Board and what it means to be a leader in our community, it rejuvenates me.”

“To be able to tie my family’s story to this mission is healing. I am proud, especially now, to be part of the nation’s newest comprehensive cancer center,” he added.

His dad would be proud too.

Conor (center) with his dad, two older brothers and mom on a beach trip to Nags Head, NC, in August 1990.

Honor or remember a father or father figure in your life with a gift to Massey

A future without cancer – and with more Father’s Days together with family – starts with YOU. Make your Father’s Day gift a tribute by including a message or note of gratitude to a father or father figure in your life. For a minimum gift of $25, Massey will send a personalized Tribute Card to your honoree.

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Written by: Katherine Layton